Production Code: AM-417
First Air Date: March 26, 2001
Teleplay: David E. Kelley
Story: David E. Kelley, Kerry Lenhart & John L. Sakmar
Director: Kenny Ortega
# of Times Richard said Bygones: 0
Robert Downey Jr. as Larry Paul
Will Ally really let Larry buy a couch from Sears? Who is that man sucking face with Elaine and can a fat, bald man really be loved? Keep reading for the answers to these and other burning questions, and please send all leftover Pottery Barn catalogs to Ms. McBeal.
Ling (of all lawyers) represented a perpetually happy CEO who is letting his empire go to ruins. His son (evil married Mystic Pizza guy) wants his pop to get a blood clot drained so that he’ll go back to being his normal Trumpian self. Dad disagreed until his wife died of cancer then he, and even Richard were weirded out by his inability to grieve, so he got the operation.
Does Ling have Gecko color-adapting personality or something? Wouldn’t growly Ling have felt nauseous around such euphoria instead of serenely smiling?
At least Elaine finally lived up to Britney Spear’s faux billing. We’ve been hearing for years that she’s a manizer but all we’ve ever seen is harmless flirting leaving Lainie with a broken heart. A and L spied Elaine making out with a guy from an old dating service she’d been involved with, and at first she was begging Ally to cover for her, but at the last minute she confessed to Mark about the sexcapade and broke up with him.
Do you think Elaine really meant it when she told Mark they had just been biding their time?
Meanwhile, Ally, looking positively voluminous in big curls and horizontal stripes, dragged Larry into her Hatfield and McCoy feud with Jackson. Larry took the side of bride to be Julie when Jackson placed visions of her dancing away with millions inside her vulnerable fiance’s balding head. Jackson mentioned Ally’s mistaking him for the remote control and Larry mumbled I hate you, while the couple had a nasty falling out. All in all a grand time until The Biscuit got sentimental and put the couple back together in the uni-. Another perfect dysfunction ruined for the sake of happiness, cue Ling to smile serenely.
Who would you rather have looking out for your best interests Larry, Jackson, or John?
Oh, and Larry said that he bought the couch, but really, at this point we wouldn’t mind if he bought his ties at Wal-Mart either.